Saturday, 20 April 2013

Being Hard on Myself

I am my worst critic, I am being so hard on myself.  I set this challenge and it was just to keep me busy I guess.  Every now and then I get a ‘Like’ from a FB friend then I am like yeah that’s nice.  For the most of it my work goes unnoticed.  I am enjoying it, it has brought a very new dimension to my day.  I look around for ideas, I see inspiration almost everywhere.  When I say look it is a preoccupation.  Sometimes it is just the lack of vocabulary that prevents me from getting a poem together.  I tap out things on my Blackberry whilst on the train, I will find a scrap of paper and jot something down.  I have poems in various states of readiness.  

Sometimes poems I write frightens me.  Sometimes they have a strong political slant.  Politics are everywhere, others are just so damn personal and intimate.  I am like can’t share that.  This is why I started in performance poetry over 13 years ago and to date I haven’t published a poetry book, a collection.  Well with this FB challenge I am hoping the book near enough produces itself.  It’s a foolproof idea if there is anything like that.

Posted fb 20/04/13

#78 What Was I Thinking
What was I thinking
I can’t do this
There is only so much writing
Anyone person can submit
I’ve reached my limit
There is nothing less
What can I say
I tried my best
I have ideas
But nothing concrete
Let me put my pen down
And admit defeat
I’ve written over 100 poems I am sure
They can’t expect any more
Some have been average
Some have been good
There is nothing left in me
I even taken it to the Hood
I am so opinionated
I talk so much
There must be something left
Just a little touch
Something I can expand on
Something that will grow
If I don’t try I will never know....

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